Dara's Ditties

thoughts, reflections, and snippets of my life...

Sat

Mother's Day

Okay, so I know Mother's Day was last week, but being a busy mother of two I often find it hard to make the time to sit down and collect my thoughts. When I finally do sit down, all I feel like doing is melting into the couch and letting my brain go numb...I know I can't be the only mother who feels this way. 

This was my first Mother's Day as a mommy of two. It's so hard to believe that Ben is almost three, and that Sam is crawling, pulling himself up, and feeding himself (there will no spoon feeding for this little guy...he has made that VERY clear)! 

I look back on pictures of myself after I had Ben...I was tired, but amazingly fresh faced looking. Now, almost three years later, the wrinkles are a bit more obvious, those stray grey hairs are poking through, and even the best puffy eye reducer cannot erase the evidence of Sam's 5am wake-up calls. My body has changed...oh, how it has changed. Gravity is cruel, and those stretch marks....hopefully will fade over time. 

There are the days when the whining makes me want to put myself in a time-out and spend some quiet time in my bedroom with Petey, he doesn't need much...just a lap to sit on. *sigh*

BUT, they do grow fast, and I don't want to miss a minute of it. The other day Sam woke up from his nap, still groggy. I picked him up and rocked him and sang him songs, and for about five minutes he just rested his head on my shoulder and listened. I have to enjoy each one of these moments now, because soon enough, my boys will be embarrassed to have their mom kiss them good-bye at school and my heart aches at the thought...

The stretch marks are just a reminder to me of what my body spent nine months doing. Gravity, well, I suppose I could use that gym membership a bit more often, and there's always botox for my wrinkles, right?

Being a mother is a gift. I would not change one thing. I feel so lucky to wake up everyday to my two perfect little beings. Not everyday runs smoothly, but everyday I learn something new, about being a better person, a better mom, a better wife, a better friend. Ben and Sam teach me life lessons, about patience, not crying over spilled milk, getting dirty means we've had fun, ice cream makes a fine dinner...and about trains...I've learned more about trains than I ever thought I could want to know....
-- 
Dara Schwartz
Sent with Sparrow
Wed

Dear Ben...

 

(This email came to us for Ben last night from my Dad...Poppi)

Dear Ben:

I'm really glad that  Dad and Mom took you outside to see the Space Shuttle and the International Space Station pass over your house. I know that it just looked like a bright star moving fast but it was something special. I stood outside of our house with Nonni and we watched it, too. Seeing the Shuttle and Space Station pass by overhead filled me with this same sense of wonder and excitement that I had when I was a boy and watched the early days of space exploration.   I was 12 years old when the Russians launched the first satellite into space. It was called Sputnik. About two years later I saw my first satellite pass by in the night sky.  I was 16 when the Russians sent the first man into space. His name was Yuri Gagarin and he was called a cosmonaut, which the same as an astronaut. His little space capsule flew in the night sky over New York City, the place I was living in, and I went outside to watch it. it looked like a bright star moving very fast across the sky. Even though our country, the United States, and Russia were not friends at the time I found my self saying to him--good luck, be safe. Being interested in space, and the moon, planets, and stars is very important. Maybe one day you'll fly a rocket ship to the moon--that would really be great!!

All my love, 

Poppi  

Wed

A Letter to Audrey

Dear Grandma Audrey,
 
It’s hard to imagine that I cannot just pick up the phone and hear your voice saying, “Hello, Dara Darling”, but I will forever remember those words in my mind. I’m so glad you had the chance to spend time with Mike and Ben. It’s not often a little person gets to meet their great-grandma, and I loved how you automatically loved Mike, simply because I did, and how you instantly treated him like one of the family.

I have so many memories of you – Your big hugs and warm kisses, our trips to Florida, the smell of your apartment building, your candy dish, the canal, your pot roast, your perfume, your shining white hair, celebrating your birthdays, coming to Florida on my own and spending special time together... going to movies, dinners, playing your keyboard, singing and dancing. I remember realizing that for 90-something, my grandma is pretty hip in her thinking, making it so easy to talk to you like a friend. I will remember your visits to California with Grandpa Julie. Grandpa Julie, who always played games with us, told funny jokes, did his exercises every morning, and poured Metamucil into his orange juice-stirring and stirring...the stirring that drove you crazy!

I will remember your strength, your strength as a woman. I will remember your painted nails, the way you always talked about grandpa Irving with such love, your confidence, and your enormous heart. A heart of gold.

Though Ben probably won’t remember his visits with Nana, and Sam never got the chance to meet you in-person, they will know their extraordinary Nana. They will know you through the stories we share, through the pictures we show them, the memory book you made us. They will know you through Nonni and Poppi, Uncle Bob and Aunt Renee. Though you are not here in person, your spirit is here, and will live on in each of us, because we are a part of you.

You will be greatly missed, but it makes me smile to think that after all of these years apart, you and Grandpa Irving can finally be together again.

We love you, Grandma Audrey, with all our hearts.

Love
Dara, Mike, Ben, and Sam

(download)

Mon

(Just a Few) Things I Love About Ben

*The way he holds a sandwich with his little hands

*The way he strokes my face when I put him to sleep

*The way his hair curls after a nap

*His sweet voice when I ask him a question and he says, "Sure Mom, sure."

*The quiet "sssshhhhhh, it's okay, Sam," that he says when Sam is fussy in the back of the car

*His independence and curiosity

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*The way he calls Daddy, "Mike", and when you ask him who Mike is, he says, "Daddy"

*The way he refers to Sam as, "My Sam"

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*When he calls "scissors," "fissors"

*That every other word is, "Why? Why mommy?"

*His love of books

*When he "helps" me fold the laundry

*Baking together

*His growing imagination and creativity

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*When he says, "I love you, Mommy"

Ben-smile

 

Thu

Year In Review

I get sentimental...a lot. I could spend hours looking through old pictures...wedding albums, friends, pictures of Ben (and now Sam)...it never gets old. When looking through all of the photos that I took from this past year, it was amazing to me all of the firsts Ben experienced, and all of the firsts I experienced through Ben's eyes.

The Zoo, Disneyland, pre-school, the Dentist (of-course the list goes on and on). I wanted to upload some pictures that looked back over the year. It was hard, there were just too many to choose from. So I picked these two.

There is something so sweet about Ben and his daddy staring out at the ocean (his first time on the sands of Venice Beach). 

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Then I chose this picture of Ben and Sam...brothers. Smiling. I look forward to capturing many more of these smiles together over the years.

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Mon

Christmas at the Schwuzzards

For the past 4 years we've been spending our Christmases in Charlotte, North Carolina with Mike's family. This year we decided to stay close to home since it might be more difficult traveling with two, and to start some of our own family traditions with Ben and Sam. Ben was really excited about Christmas this year! He seemed to really get the idea of Santa and his reindeer. We had a little Elf named Red, who lived in our house during the month of December. He kept a close eye on whether Ben was naughty or nice. Ben would wake up every morning and go searching the house for Red, asking him about his travels back to the North Pole to see Santa. He was very sad to wake up yesterday morning, only to discover that Red had gone back to North Pole until next year.

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Ben wouldn't wear his Mickey Mouse ears in Disneyland, but he busted them out to parade around the tree...go figure!

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A friend of ours, Marc, was in-town visiting from Vietnam (where he's been living for the past 10 months). He shared our Christmas Eve and Christmas morning!

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Petey!!!!

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Uncle Mark, passing out gifts.

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Can you find my dad? He's hidden behind the bag of garbage (one of four bags of trash...a little excessive????) What a MESS...

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Playing with our new toys. Life is good.

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The rest of the day was spent eating, eating, and then eating some more. Special Pancake for breakfast (a tradition in my family), hot dogs for lunch (a new tradition????), and turkey/cranberry enchiladas, which were delicious! I'm definitely going to have to make use of that gym membership!!! HA!

Happy Holidays!

Wed

Halloween

Last year for Halloween, Ben was one and wasn't so sure about the whole trick-or-treating thing. What a difference a year makes!!! Halloween was three days ago and Ben is still carrying around his bucket (with four pieces of candy in it...because I sent the rest off to work with Mike), and asking to go trick-or-treating. He loved dressing up as a train engineer (because he is obsessed with trains right now), and once he got warmed up, enjoyed walking up to the doors and saying, "trick-or-treat!".

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This year we also carved a pumpkin, which Ben helped scoop the seeds out of,

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and then daddy carved it up!

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Sam helped by sitting around and looking cute in his giraffe costume...

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Ben 2008

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Fri

Oakland Zoo

Since Mike is heading back to work soon (we're going to miss him...he's been home almost 2 months!!!), I decided I needed to make the most of the time we have left. It had been a while since Ben and I got to do something special just the two of us, so I took him to the Oakland Zoo (threatening rain clouds and all). Luckily, the rain held off until we left, but we had a great time together!


We rode the carousel,

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saw the giraffes,

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climbed atop tomato frogs,

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indulged in some pb&j with fries,

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rode the steam train (Ben's FAVORITE part),

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and left very happy. I love spending time with my big boy!

Sun

A Phase?

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No, those band-aids are not because Ben actually needs them. Ben has become obsessed with band-aids. What is it about band-aids kids love so much? I just hope they fall off in the bath...I don't want to be the one to have to take them all off. Ouch!
Posterous theme by Cory Watilo